So I’ve been really quiet on here for a lot of reasons lately. Partly it’s because of a lack of what I considered “interesting” thoughts. Partly it’s because that the premise of the blog (Wheeler: wondrous world wanderer wistfully writing wacky wampeters) is something that a lower middle class dude with an English degree can only sustain part of the year.
I mean, holy hell is travel expensive when it’s not your real job.
Also, part of this blog feels kind of like self fan fiction. I generally only care to portray the parts of myself that are in line with what my sister calls “Fantasy Me.” So when I spend a month in a black pit of depression, I end up just not saying anything because I don’t feel like the version of me that even keeps a blog. I feel like the version of me that lies in repose and eats chicken while watching cartoons all day. I need to figure out a reverse “Fantasy Me” thing.
It’s funny, because I just came off of a semi-break with the internet. I was restricted to just Instagram and some blogs. It all felt overwhelming, and like I spent all day with my eyes basically locked into my phone screen. I hadn’t cracked a book in a month, I hadn’t even fired up my desktop for anything but work stuff, and I’d even stopped creating in a lot of ways. So the break loosened it up. It helped me re-disconnect my “self” from the internet in a way that helped build a lot of confidence and mindfulness. Yet, it didn’t make me more productive.
I just slowly began reintegrating my loves back into my daily life. I began listening to full albums of music at a time again. I picked up long form video games I’d wanted to play. I began going to the movies again (huge recommendation for both Thor and Lady Bird as my most recent ones, though I’m not sure I can imagine two more opposite movies). I began taking long drives in a random direction again, just me and my notebook. My guitar and piano don’t have dust on them any more.
So why break up a good thing?
Well again, I feel like the next step after slowly reconstructing yourself is to begin to subject it to external pressures. Also, people are fun and interesting and generally okay.
Like it or not, the Internet is part of our lives. The upcoming Net Neutrality crisis will determine how much it remains an essential necessity for modern life and how much will have to retreat back into the real world as a result of being exposed to the winds and whimsy of enormous telecom companies. But for now, there are still interactions and works of art that I want to witness before I am demoted to Drone access levels.
Oh yeah, as a part of this whole “more honesty” thing, politics will ramp up.
One more thought in that area: the resignation of Al Franken tells me that there is still some (a wee smidge of) accountability in Washington, but that the Republican party just has none of it (yes he should have resigned weeks ago, but at least he did and his fellow Senators and party members drove that). This, is an improvement of my previous views. Taking a principled stand doesn’t mean you’ll win against people who don’t believe in any thing, but it definitely means holding people accountable for their actions. All of them. “Not that bad” and other what-about-isms only serve to defend the indefensible, and political machinations should never stand in the way of what is right.
Okay, I’m done, you can look now
So the point of this post is to say that I’m back. That I appreciate every last one of you viewing, thinking about the nonsense I spout, and that I’d try to keep doing this even if all of you left me alone to rant on a server somewhere, because it’s important to me.
woo boy do I have a backlog of these:
Man, Baby Driver was fantastic, and The Jon Spencer Blues Explosion is one of my favorite newfound bands.
Speaking of driving music, Thomas Vent cranks out bangers with frightening consistency.
Quite possibly my favorite band ever is releasing an album soon!!!
Okay I’ll stop now so I’ll have some more to post in the coming weeks.
Peace, love, and vengeance to you all